K: Ken in his Khakis

In living up to my promise to be unique during the A-Z Challenge, K was the toughest competitor so far.  Kindness, the Kindle, Kryptonite…might all be over used.  I’ll hedge my bets that no one else is going to write about Ken’s Khakis.  So, here it goes…

This is Ken…                                                                        

KenWhen I was younger, I owned this  man.  I owned him.  He was MINE…all mine.

Ken had a closet full of nice clothes.  This tuxedo.  A few collared shirts.  One brown sweater.  And, one fantastic metallic purple jacket that he borrowed every so often from his friend, Donny Osmond.

 

 

Source: www.coolspotters.com

 

When it came to pants, the boy only had one pair – khakis.  I remember those pants very well because one of the pant legs didn’t hold a leg.  You see, my Ken was a one-legged man.  He still had a cute face and nice abs, though. 

And this is the story of how Ken lost his leg…

candi My younger sister didn’t have a Barbie or a Ken.  She had a doll named Candi with horribly frizzy hair.  Candi didn’t have a boyfriend…probably because of her wacked-out hair.  When Candi got lonely, or when Barbie and Ken wanted to go out on a double date, Candi had to sneak out with the father of the Sunshine Family collection. He was short and unattractive compared to Ken. Worst of all, he was married with a kid.  Ironically, the man also wore khaki-colored khakis. 

DannyOne day, after a horrible double-date experience, Candi, possessed by the evil, jealous thoughts of my own little sister, pushed Ken down a flight of stairs.  He landed with a thud onto the concrete floor, screaming in pain.  His leg was broken.  His hip had popped out of joint.   There was no hope.  The doctors had to amputate. 

                                                           Sources:  www.megomuseaum.com and www.allthingsfadra.com

And this is why, for the rest of my life, I will always remember the story of Ken in his Khakis. Jealousy is one of those things that starts very early in life…so be careful when you’re feeling envious…someone could lose a leg. 

Are there any stories from your childhood that you’ll never forget?

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14 responses to this post.

  1. I love this post. It may me laugh. Childhood stories are great sources to use when writing fiction. I do it all the time.

    Also love: “When I was younger, I owned this man. I OWNED him.” lol. Life was so much simpler back then.

    Reply

    • Hi Diane! Life was much more simple, indeed. I think I might head out to the toy store and buy myself a new man to OWN. One that does dishes and remembers to put the toilet seat down. Ha!

      Reply

  2. Thanks for the delightful start of my morning. Love this story! I wonder how many mishaps the Kens and Barbies of thw world have endured, and how many due to childhood jealousy!

    Reply

    • We all need a good laugh now and again. I’d guess that there are many dolls out there who’ve endured more suffering than an amputated leg. A man can do without a leg. A head on the other hand…

      Reply

  3. Posted by yadayadafishpaste on April 13, 2011 at 12:42 pm

    What an imaginative story – very original! Unfortunately don’t have any much memories of my childhood. Blessing in disguise, I think. One of the memories I do cherish is using my hula-hoop as a steering wheel for pretending to drive a bus – haha. I’ve always had a passion for things with wheels! I would love to travel more of the world.

    Reply

    • If only I’d imagined this story. It really happened – honest to goodness. Wow – your pretend bus must have been huge if its steering wheel was as big as a hula-hoop! Honk, honk!

      Reply

      • Posted by yadayadafishpaste on April 13, 2011 at 4:02 pm

        Quite tricky cornering the narrow paving around the pool – it took quite a bit of skill haha. (Of Ken can be said ‘at least he was still a pretty face’ 😉

        Reply

  4. Ha! I chuckled all the way through this post. I’m with you: How could the Sunshine Family dad EVER get any action? The hair alone is a turn off.

    For my Barbies, it was (Ken-sized) GI Joe or nothing. Even plastic women understand the appeal of a man in uniform.

    Reply

  5. *dies* Oh, what a hysterical story. I will try not to get offended about the frizzy haired girl having to date the short married man *cough* but too funny. In my house, we couldn’t afford real Barbies, so I had fake ones… all female… so one of them got a real short haircut and got the be the Butch Barbie and they just dated each other.

    Reply

    • Oh gosh – what a story! The Donny and Marie dolls at my house had it rough too…they went on dates sometimes, but were clearly brother and sister. Have a great day!

      Reply

  6. Posted by Amy on April 14, 2011 at 10:13 pm

    I am laughing out loud, by myself, right now… tears…. Told in true Tracy style… Loved it!

    Reply

  7. How funny. My friends and I were just talking about Ken, Barbi and Skipper tonight.

    Reply

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