I’m a vivid dreamer. So shame on you, Lifetime TV, for inspiring last night’s scary dream.
Lifetime’s advertising of the made-for-TV movie, The Craigslist Killer sucked me into watching the drama unfold. (Tip: DVR is the way to go – there were over 40 minutes of commercials.)
Without spoiling the ending of this award-winning spectacle of cinematography (cough), the story is about a top medical student at Boston University who leads a double life. Life 1: top of his medical class, engaged to be married, sometimes humorous, clean-cut average Joe. Life 2: demented killer who finds his victims on Craigslist and steals their panties in the process.
The unsuspecting fiancé had no idea she was about to marry a psycho. Poor girl.
Aside from jump-starting my nightmare, the movie got my daytime mind thinking about trust. What is trust, really? And, how acute are our natural instincts about it? I know a few people who got burned from trusting someone, and are definitely suspect of trusting anyone…ever again. So, trust is a big, huge, gigantic topic when it comes to our personality BACKBONES.
After thinking about this for a while, my opinion is that trust is tied to both knowledge and predictability. If I trust something or someone, it’s because I’m pretty darn sure that what I think will happen, or what that person will do…is accurate.
Trusting patterns is pretty easy.
For instance, I trust that my cat will beg for a treat when I get home from work tonight. Why do I trust this fact? Because she always begs for a treat at 8PM sharp. It’s predictable.
When it comes to people, trust takes on a completely more complex dimension. The element of truth enters the picture.
The better I know someone and the longer I know someone…the easier it is to know if I can trust them. If I can trust that their actions will be predictable… If I can trust that the words that exit their mouth will be consistent with their actions… If I can count on them… Believe in them…. Know that they mean me no harm…
For low-stake interactions, I think the natural instinct is to trust (does this dress look good on me?). However, when the stakes are raised (honey, why were you out so late last night?), the quicker we are to analyze the accuracy of our trust-o-meter.
How trusting are you? Has your trust ever been betrayed?