One of These Things is Not Like the Others

Imagine that you’re attending a fancy wedding.  Everyone is dressed up in suits and dresses…and gowns and tuxedos.  Photos are being snapped.  A nice-looking crowd is kicking it on the dance floor.

Out of the corner of your eye, beyond the stemware and centerpieces…

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…you see one of the other wedding guests…

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…dressed in a coral sweat suit.

You think….you believe…you KNOW that that wearing a body-hugging, split-to-the-knee, mid-drift showing, yoga outfit to a wedding is just plain wrong.

And, it irritates you because this girl looks comfortable and you’ve got a blister from doing the hokey-pokey in heels.

Do you…

  1. Ignore it;
  2. Think you’re out of touch with the fashion scene.
  3. Gossip about her outfit with the other well-dressed guests;
  4. Casually touch her arm to discover if the fabric is velvet or velour;
  5. Get drunk and ask her to dance; or
  6. Get confused, go to the hotel gym in your formalwear, and start running on the treadmill.

I usually try #1, then ponder #2, then do a little of #3, then blog about it.

Have a Happy Monday Everyone!

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30 responses to this post.

  1. Posted by sidmilb on October 17, 2011 at 2:40 am

    I just cradled my pumpkiLn head in my hand so I could better contemplate my response.

    Now I’m simply shaking said head.

    Reply

  2. Hi Tracy .. I think I’d miss out steps 1 – 6 .. and blog about it .. but I’d stare first, raise eyebrows, smile and laugh .. and be irritated like you with my tootsies in unused heels.

    Cheers Hilary

    Reply

  3. Shoes? People wear shoes to dance at weddings? I’m guilty of tossing them aside to dance. I can’t do the polka in heels. In fact, I can’t walk in heels at all. I walk from the vehicle to the building then leave them under the table :-)

    I’m a #1, #3 and #5. lol. Of course, I believe in comfort over fashion ever time, so it might just be me in comfortable pants, shirt and shoes.

    Reply

  4. Posted by Bonnie on October 17, 2011 at 7:13 am

    Oh, my word. I think I saw this woman in Walmart over the weekend…

    Reply

  5. Juts the weekend?

    Reply

  6. I imagine the wedding toast was “bottoms up” . Please give her my email. I’m retired(she will get my undivided attention 24/7), am a bachelor, live 2 miles from Miami Beach and have $127 saved in the credit union.

    Reply

  7. I have to agree: I would have thought that quite strange too. However, another thought that crossed my mind is whether maybe she was involved with the wedding somehow – perhaps there to make one of the elements work and almost attending it in a “while you’re at it” way..? She does look comfortable enough to do something, but not so casual that she would have looked completely tacky like someone who’s been cleaning house or something.

    I like how you discreetly cut off her head :D And for me this is the punchline: “…and then blog about it.” – followed by a good chuckle! :D I wonder if anyone had the guts to find out somehow where she fit into the picture.

    Judging by the blisters it sounds like you had a good time (but I might have longed for a soft, comfortable sneaker too :)

    Reply

    • I’m pretty sure she was a wedding guest…with wine glass in hand and all. I’ve never actually been to a wedding that’s been “crashed” but I know it does happen.

      Reply

  8. Laughing hysterically at Carl’s comment!

    Reply

  9. HILARIOUS post, Tracy!!!!!

    OMG….I HOWLED!

    And I have to be completely honest and say that I would do as you…..

    “I usually try #1, then ponder #2, then do a little of #3, then blog about it.”

    HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHA!

    Have a great Monday, girl! Thanks for the wonderful morning laugh!

    X

    P.S. but I’m still so totally amazed that someone would wear that outfit at a WEDDING!?!?

    Reply

  10. I would probably snark about her. A wedding is supposed to be a formal affair – unless it’s a sunset on the beach, come-in-your-bare-feet kind of wedding. (Kicking off your shoes from hell to be able to dance doesn’t count.)

    However, I can think of some outfits I would consider worse:
    wearing white, esp. a fancy dress as if to upstage the bride (times a factor of 3 if done by mother of either bride or groom)
    wearing black (unless the bride lacks such taste as to choose a black dress attendant wedding, in which case, she can suck it up.)

    Went to a funeral a few years ago where some of the attendees wore ratty painting shorts and worn-out flip flops. Really? What part of “showing your respect” did you not understand?

    On the other hand, I do love the bridesmaids dress clubs where they wear the butt-ugly dresses to various places – the grocery store, the laundromat, the amusement park.

    Reply

    • There were a few people at this wedding wearing jeans…so maybe the yoga outfit wasn’t all that out of place after all. Maybe I should have mentioned the location was….West Virginia…where just about anything goes.

      Reply

  11. I probably wouldn’t have even noticed. I tend not to be observant about what others wear. Guess that says something about my sense of fashion. lol

    Reply

  12. HAHAHA! Wow– her butt looks good in that. Maybe with some bling and stilettos? Haha! Or NOT!

    Reply

  13. Party crasher?

    Reply

  14. Uhhhhh…that’s just not right. I’d snap a pic, too…and point and ask, “What the hell?” but only to my date.

    Reply

  15. baaaaaaaaaahahahahha.

    that. is. hilarious.

    the slit is what really makes it amazeballs.

    is she a gloria estefan impersonator?

    Reply

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